self help

Reset

I definitely skipped writing yesterday and feel absolutely no guilt about it. Yesterday I returned from a much needed, yet also exhausting weekend away with a couple of friends. I was energized and excited from the time I got there on Friday afternoon, all the way until waking up yesterday morning knowing I had over a five hour drive home, and then the fatigue kicked in. I was so happy to come home to my love and my fur babies, and just shower away the sweat and filth from the night before. The reason this weekend came about is my friend and I wanted to see Bryce Vine this year, and we decided to meet up in Minneapolis! Saturday night after that incredible show, we met back up with her other friend and went out until bar close. The bars closed at 2am, but then daylight savings happened and suddenly we’re driving back to the apartment at 3am.

I will say, as tired as I felt today, I have zero regrets from this trip and am so happy that I got to see a concert and hang with my girls. We also went to the Mall of America and it was my first time there! Of course we did some shopping and eating, but we also went to the aquarium and the amusement park! We got a free behind-the-scenes and were able to feed the fish at the aquarium, and we even got a free ride at the amusement park! Overall I felt like a giddy child the entire weekend and absolutely lived for it.

Now that I am home I am resetting and refocusing on my current priorities in life, and I want to focus on eating better and taking care of my body more consistently. My boyfriend and I got up this morning and went to the gym before work, and even though it was a short workout for me, I am proud that I went. I am the only person in my way of achieving what I want to achieve, and it is time to take a break and re-prioritize my time and schedule. I always say I want to know how to cook, so I am going to try a new recipe this week. It doesn’t mean I have to switch my whole life in one day and make a new recipe every night of the week, but just making small efforts will help get the ball rolling.

I am excited for this season in my life, as I continue to turn inward and focus on myself and my needs, I will continue to build confidence and more love for myself and others. I truly believe that when people are feeling their best, then they give their best, which is why I never think self-care or self-improvement is selfish. But to some people it is, and with that being said, it’s time for me to start enjoying my selfish era.

Check in/Reflection

How am I feeling? I’ve been having some obnoxious PMS the past few days; the on and off nausea is what’s bothering me the most. I’ve been so irritable and emotional and my period is supposedly coming in a few days, so I’m hoping that all of this goes away. I was going to go out to the bars last night with some friends, but decided to stay in since drinking would definitely not help my nausea. I also have just been feeling like I want to be alone lately; I need to do some self-reflection.

I recently was thinking about how I wasn’t always the nicest person as a kid, and I still find myself being judgmental of others. I was super critical of myself when I was younger, and that also made me critical of those around me. As I’ve grown older and been on my self-love journey over the last couple of years, I’m realizing that when I am being judgmental of someone else, it’s because I am seeing something of myself in them.

Often times how we feel about others is a reflection of how we’re feeling about ourselves. For example, money is a huge trigger for me/my anxiety. A lot of my sense of worth and control is revolved around money, which is another thing I am working on. If I find myself being judgmental of how someone is spending their money, it’s because I have an issue/insecurity about myself and my money habits. What someone else does with their life is none of my business, I can only control myself and my mindset.

I also know that I am a very empathetic and understanding person; I can very easily put myself in someone else’s shoes and get an understanding of why they make the choices they do. It’s also helpful to realize that most people do have unresolved traumas and are the way they are because of that. We couldn’t control our childhood or how we were parented, but today we can control how we parent ourselves.

Diving into what we truly need and finding out how we can give that to ourselves is extremely important. I need loving, healthy relationships, whether with my boyfriend or with friends or family; I can no longer tolerate those who do not respect myself or my boundaries. I get to choose who I spend time with and who is in my life.

I need to feel healthy, and how I do that is try to get my body moving every day, even if it’s just a bit of stretching. I try to balance making sure I get my veggies and fruits in everyday, as well as protein, but I could definitely be better at that. That is something I can try to spend more time/effort on so I feel that I’m living true to my values.

I need to feel knowledgeable, and I have been listening to podcasts more recently as well as reading! I was on a good streak for reading but kind of slowed down within the lag couple months. If I dedicate time to get back into reading, I will feel more fulfilled as I know one of my goals is to write a book one day, and this will definitely be helpful in getting me there. The more books I read, the more knowledge I’ll have and be able to apply to my life and maybe even my first book!

I enjoy experiences, but I also like to do so on a budget. I could look into more local free events and see if friends want to attend, or maybe even just go alone. An experience can really be anything; going to a farmers market, checking out the local library, walking on a new trail… there are truly endless options. Something I could do is set a goal to do at least one new experience a month, and if I want to increase frequency, I can!

I want to heal my traumas and learn how to manage stress and my emotions. I still see my therapist every once in a while, and I make it a point to listen to healing podcasts and follow self-love accounts on instagram, but I know there is more I can do. Writing this blog post is something that is so important, because it is allowing me to talk to myself and figure out my true wants/needs.

I think we all have an idea of what we want, but when we look deeper we find that we aren’t really living a lifestyle that is in alignment with our desires. I want to live a life that is in alignment with my values, and I feel like I am already doing this! However, I also feel that I can dedicate more time to myself and my desires, and I deserve that. We all deserve to live our best lives as our best selves!

MonDay Dreaming

A few weeks ago I decided to switch my weekly posts to Mondays instead of Sundays, because I noticed on Mondays that I would typically get more traction, but to be honest it has kind of thrown me off! I am likely going to go back to Sundays, but I also keep saying that I’m going to write more, and I haven’t been; but I have a reason for that.

I’ve been trying to spend more time reading books; my main focus has been “self-help” books, which has honestly been so inspiring to me. I am loving reading work from today different authors and finding new perspectives and ways to basically re-frame your mindset in a more positive way. I know that if I read about more topics, I’ll only have more ideas to write about! In which case, I will begin to write more.

In reality, I’d love to write a book one day, and honestly I intend to do so. I always have told my boyfriend that we should write a book on relationships, and although I’d still love to do that one day, I think I’d like to write a self-help book one day. Not only that, but I’ve also always enjoyed poetry and would love to maybe even do some sort of positive self-help poetry book! I hope that as I continue on my self-care journey, I’ll find more and more ways that we can help ourselves and portray such ideas within my writings.

I’ve been trying to dedicate my free time to reading, listening to self-help/inspirational podcasts, and also I’ve been working out! I’ve been going to the gym a few days a week, and I’ve been going on walks whenever it’s nice out! It’s nice actually dedicating time for myself that is beneficial to future me!

I’m off to the park to go on a walk so I can soak up some of this sunshine before it’s gone! Make sure to take time to yourself today, even if it’s just a couple minutes!