inspiration

“Let Them”

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Mel Robbins has talked a lot about this topic: “Let them.” She even wrote a book about it that is available for preorder (which I need to order that at some point). This phrase has become so powerful, because it allows you to take your energy and time back, and it allows you to let go of control.

In reality, we can’t change anyone else; I mean, look how hard it is to make changes in your own life! Yet, even though we know we can’t make anyone else change, we may still spend time and energy being bothered by things they do that we don’t understand. We waste our own time thinking about how others should change or even thinking about how they perceive us, when we cannot control any of that at all!

No matter how mindful or nice I try to be, someone could still think I am annoying or rude. I have no control over how someone else views me, and in reality, it really isn’t my business. How we feel about ourselves is what really matters- and a lot of us carry a lot of shame and guilt that we end up projecting onto our outer world. That is why the more we heal our own wounds, the more we heal the world. If we have less assumptions and projections and we have more discussions and connections, then we recognize how similar we all are and can give each other (and ourselves) grace.

Let people think what they want about you- as long as you know and love yourself, that is what matters. Let people act the way they do; as an adult you can set boundaries and if they break those boundaries, you can decide to let go of that relationship. In other words, then it’s time for “let me.” You are in control of your own decisions and who you decide to spend your time with. When someone is not respectful of your boundaries, listen to them.

We can complain all we want about people crossing our boundaries, but if we never stand up for ourselves, that is also a choice. You get to decide how long you put up with disrespect. We also complain about other people’s choices or actions, but that is literally taking time and energy away from your own life goals. You get to decide if you want to keep thinking about and judging someone’s actions over focusing on your own dreams and ambitions.

“Let them” is powerful, and so is “let me.” This year, I am leaning more into this theory. As I approach my 30th birthday (well, it’s not until July LOL), I am reminded to take a look at how I spend my own time and start to be more intentional with it. I live a very beautiful life and I never want to take it for granted. I am grateful for the countless blessings that surround me, and I am so happy to be present to all of this.

January 11 (111)

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I woke up so excited to the sun shining after how dull and gloomy it was yesterday. I also am so excited that today is one of my favorite angel numbers: 1/11!

111 symbolizes new beginnings, but also being in touch with your intuition. I see 111 a lot, and I even saw in on a license plate less than an hour before my husband was proposing to me! I understand that scientifically seeing these repetitive numbers is just because of neuroplasticity (like when you’re thinking about buying a certain car & then you see it everywhere on the road), but I still feel magic and love when I see angel numbers.

I want to take this time for a prayer for new beginnings in humanity:

I pray that empathy and curiosity become more prevalent than judgement and resentment. I pray that kindness and love is the most common practice in this world, removing all of the negativity and evilness. I pray that everyone who is in need is given access to what they need to not only survive, but thrive. I pray that we truly connect with each other and our world, rather than having superficial connections based on views and followers. I pray that humans recognize that there is strength in numbers, and together we can make change in this world.

I always say that we are more alike than we are different. We all have traumas, we all have stories, we all have emotions, and we all have the ability to learn and adapt. As we learn more about our experiences and how they impacted us, the more we can heal and learn to truly love ourselves. When we are feeling full of love and gratitude, we can pour that same energy into others and into this world.

Sending extra love to everyone this lovely Saturday, and wishing everyone a happy 111!

Saturday Blessings

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The sun is shining! ☀️

The coffee is hitting! ☕️

The grocery order is picked up! 🛒

The house is relatively clean! ✨

We’re in good health! 🙌🏼

The nails are cute! 💅🏻

Feeling blessed today, and grateful to be alive. 🫶🏼

✨555✨

Letting Go (1-3-25)

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I am letting go of my worries and anxieties about the future, and instead I am trusting that I can handle anything that comes my way.

I am letting go of the need for perfectionism, and instead I am embracing mistakes and failures, as I know they only allow me to evolve.

I am letting go of shame and embarrassment, and instead I am leaning into self-love and confidence in myself and my uniqueness.

Eggshells (walking through my thoughts)

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I get really reactive when I mess something up. It triggers the perfectionism in me- like I am not allowed to make mistakes, like all of my work was for nothing, like I’m a failure. Sometimes I feel the spiral coming and I just let it. Instead of using my tools or pausing to breathe, sometimes I just let it overtake me.

Am I too tired to use my tools, or am I punishing myself because I feel like I deserve it? I know I’m not too lazy to change and do the work, because I’ve made so much noticeable progress over the years- so is it self-sabotage? Is it just being a fucking human being with an ego? Is it hormones? Did I eat enough today? No.

Today was just annoying in and of itself, I was over all of it. Today feels like a regression, but I am now recognizing as I type this that this is part of the journey to becoming emotionally mature. Paying attention to these things that get me so bothered and actually trying to understand them.

Like I am very aware that I grew up in a reactive household. I also am aware that I had a verbally abusive father who often told me I was a dumbass, and even told me that I’d fail when I moved out on my own and I’d be crying to come back there. So failure just never feels like the option- but who is here to “punish me” when I fail? No one… so I do it. But why? Would I scream at a friend or my husband for making a simple mistake like dropping an eggshell in batter? Absolutely not! But that is 100% what sent me on a spiral this evening.

Granted again, I had a rough day as it is just getting triggered about people and their lack of work ethic, but why does that bother me? Likely, because I have been working for what feels like most of my life and always have put pride into what I do. I have also worked for shitty employers who did not appreciate my work, and I am blessed to say I don’t have that problem anymore- so that’s why I get triggered when I can see good bosses being taken advantage of. However, I can focus on myself and stay in my line and keep doing my job, and that is definitely what is best for myself and my mental health.

Back to the whole thing where I feel like I’m stupid when I fuck up- I am very much aware that I hold myself to insane standards that I don’t expect from anyone else… I just struggle to let it go. I struggle because I feel that my high standards are what got me to where I am today. Moving out at 19, buying a house at 21, working upwards in my career, having a stable relationship- weren’t my high standards for myself the reason I could do all of this?

When I actually think about that… no they aren’t. Me being me and being able to reach out for help and use resources is the reason I’m able to do the things I do. Holding myself to insane expectations only allows me to feel rigid and anxious when things aren’t going right- but failure is just an opportunity to learn and pivot.

Failure is an inevitable thing in life- I hear it in so many self-help podcast interviews with successful people. They always say that failure is basically step one- we all have to fail to be able to learn and grow for the next experience. Today I learned that I will always crack eggs in a separate container before mixing them in batter so it is easier to remove the shell. I wouldn’t have learned that without dropping the shells in.

The best part of all of this stupid eggshell story is that I got the eggshells out of the batter eventually anyways! So I had an entire spiral of negativity for no reason; but also since I believe that everything happens for a reason- I guess this was it. I honestly am proud of myself that I even took time to sit and journal myself out of the triggered state.

I really do want to stop punishing myself and holding myself to such high standards, and now I can refer back to this post where I literally show myself how doing those things aren’t necessary or helpful at all. This one thing won’t fix it all, this will be a repetitive process until I build a strong habit, and I am very much willing to do the work. Guess I’ll start with giving myself grace and celebrating this little win of slowing down and dissecting my thoughts with curiosity.

Quick Thoughts 12-12-24

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• 24 is 12+12 and today is 12-12-24. something about that feels right and makes my heart feel good.

• I feel so much lighter mentally being off of social media (been off since 12/1)

• Focusing on letting go and minding my own business- not everything needs to be analyzed

• Kindness goes a long way

• Sometimes we don’t understand because we aren’t meant to

Tonight’s Thoughts

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Propaganda (Oxford): “Persuasive mass communication that filters and frames the issues of the day in a way that strongly favours particular interests; usually those of a government or corporation.”

Propaganda (Merriam-Webster): “The spreading of ideas, information, or rumor for the purpose of helping or injuring an institution, a cause, or a person.”

Propaganda (Brittanica): “Ideas or statements that are often false or exaggerated and that are spread in order to help a cause, a political leader, a government, etc.”

I hated history in school, but I do remember learning a bit about propaganda. The generation I am a part of is the first one who grew up with the internet and social media. we don’t have to wait for the channel 7’s breaking story, we have thousands of stories at our fingertips at every waking moment.

It is so easy for anyone with power behind the media/algorithms to control us, because we’re addicted to the screens and we’re addicted to the stress. It’s sad to see so much hatred and division, but diving and conquering seems to work for those in power.

I know this all sounds sooooo doom and gloom, but I honestly think there’s hope. I think that more people have common goals than they think, and we need to actually learn how to sit and actually have a conversations to listen, learn, and collaborate. We need to learn how to manage our emotions, rather than letting our emotions manage us. Consuming copious amounts of traumatic images and horrendous events repeatedly is actually doing something to our brains.

I thought the answer was to get off of social media, and honestly I still feel that in a way, but this is also a way to share information and hopefully help people to realize how much we could actually do together. We’re all skin and bones, and I’m always going to be hopeful that love wins in the end. Humans deserve peace.

New Moon in Taurus: A Love Letter To Myself.

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It’s been amazing to watch you grow into the woman you are today. A woman who is no longer afraid of her emotions. Once upon a time you wanted to completely rid herself of them, and with just a few months of Zoloft that goal was achieved. It didn’t take long for you to recognize how lost you were without them, without your powers.

The sensitivity you have to others and to the world around you is a gift when you learn how to use it, and it’s amazing to see you catching on. I see you allowing yourself to feel that childlike joy and also allowing yourself to feel the anger that you’ve been shoving away for too long. Far too long. See how the world has shifted now that you accept and embrace these feelings? No wonder you want to share this with the world.

You care so deeply for others, for humanity as a whole actually. You’ve seen and felt what pain and trauma does to one’s mental health and well being, which makes it easy to have empathy for those who are struggling. You know what it’s like to not be able to feel the true love and joys around you, and now that you can feel them, you want everyone else to be able to feel them too.

You used to let this empathy consume you; losing yourself in everyone else’s worries that they all endlessly dumped on you. You absorbed the anxieties they had and abandoned yourself for too long, completely losing track of what was yours and what wasn’t. You did all of this while trying to keep up a perfect appearance to literally everyone around you- never releasing your own problems or feelings, because they all had enough to worry about.

You always felt like a burden, which is why you made sure to always put everyone else’s happiness before your own. If other people were happy, then there was less likely to be any conflict, thus giving a feeling of safety. You were in survival mode for most of your childhood and early 20s, and I am proud of the transformation you have made through your healing journey.

You allow yourself to rest without shaming yourself about it; instead you now realize it is necessary to recharge your own battery. You are present in your life, making new memories and taking time to enjoy the time with loved ones. You no longer talk about yourself negatively, but instead with the same empathy and grace you’ve always given to others. You have recognized the importance of speaking up and being authentic, and you openly and kindly share your thoughts and opinions with those who you’re close to. You prioritize spending your time and energy with the right people, and you aren’t afraid to say “no.”

You have grown so much throughout the years, and I am so proud of who you are. You deserve peace and love, and you have it all around you and within you. You are a magical woman with a strong intuition, and you’re a magnet for miracles. I love you so much, and I’m so happy to finally be here with you in this beautiful and crazy world. I am here. I am home.

Here Comes The Eclipse

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All I see people posting about is the solar eclipse tomorrow on April 8. As I have been dabbling in astrology, I personally am excited for this eclipse. Eclipses are looked at as powerful times where we can harness the energy to set our intentions and truly shift our lives in the direction that we want to go. I am really trying to stay focused on the positive and keep a faith based mindset rather than fear, as of course, the other side of the Internet is all conspiracies about the end times.

The more I go through this life, the more I just believe that we do create our own reality and whatever we believe to be true will be true. I know that can’t really apply to science and math, and it may not make sense to everyone, but if two things can be true at the same time while having complete opposite meetings, then why couldn’t this be possible? Maybe this is the “end times,” but doesn’t that also mean it’s time for a new beginning?

I have not followed any religion closely, nor do I know the stories of the Bible, but there are people who follow the Bible who are noticing the timing and the path of the Eclipse. This path of darkness crosses through many religiously significant towns, such as Jonah TX, and Rapture, IN. Also, the path apparently passes through seven different towns named Nineveh, which is where Jonah had to go to urge people to repent their evil ways otherwise the town would be destroyed. To some, they believe this is the time that Jesus will come back.

I’ve also seen videos pop up on my Instagram feed talking about a solar eclipse that happened in 1811 and how huge earthquakes happened a couple months after that which caused the Earth to open up. We just had a 4.8 earthquake in New Jersey which some find to be ironic, because the solar eclipse is also on 4/8. Apparently eclipses can bring wild weather events, which we are already seeing with the wild storm in KY and also a huge 7.4 earthquake in Taiwan.

Regardless of what the eclipse can bring or what it symbolizes, I am still leaning into faith. I believe this world needs togetherness, along with and mutual understanding and empathy. I believe that the more we continue to love ourselves and let that love spill out and over onto others, the happier we will be as a species. I’m praying that we can come together and recognize how beautiful this world is, how amazing each other are, and how much goodness we can accomplish together.

Leaning into faith over fear. Thanking my angels and guides of the highest truth. Being present to the love around me. I am blessed. I am grateful. I am ready. 🤍

Early Sunday Thoughts from my Bed

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As I lie here half asleep in my comfortable, warm bed, I can’t help but feel content. I remember the days where the second my eyes were open, I was immediately up working on household chores or school work or some other task that probably didn’t actually need to be done; I wouldn’t allow myself to rest. I’d always tell myself “I just have to get it all done now so I can relax later,” but later never came. I’d just add more and more tasks, none of which contained any rest or self care.

I used to feel chronically guilty and shameful when I’d rest or spend any time (or money) on myself. I felt shame around resting because it felt like laziness. I felt shame around spending money on myself because it felt like a waste- like whatever I had just purchased was stupid or completely unnecessary. If something unexpected came up and we needed money, I’d immediately think of how much I spent on myself and feel guilty and like everything was my fault. I always felt like everything was my fault.

I now live a life where I have unlearned some unhealthy patterns and I have released such shameful, guilty feelings for the most part. As a human, sometimes I will get triggered again, but it’s easier to acknowledge and give myself grace as I am aware of where these issues stem from. I feel so blessed to be able to just lay in bed next to the love of my life and relax for hours and not feel an ounce of guilt. Tasks will get done, life will go on, and it’s important to think about which memories are the ones I’ll want to bask in when I’m an old lady.

I’ll never regret cuddles with my fiancé or with my cats. I won’t regret the iced coffees or trips to cute downtown areas. I won’t regret the times I spent writing or being creative. I won’t regret taking the time to count my blessings. I won’t regret nice phone calls with friends. I won’t regret the fact that I decided to focus on my mental health and my own well-being, as it has allowed me to be more present in my life and truly soak in the love that surrounds me. More importantly, it allows me give that love to myself.