My goals of healthy living align with my future self because I want to be able to travel and hike and keep up with my future children. I also want to have more healthy food options around for my future children, so they don’t struggle like I do with my lack of palette.
I have been avoiding taking responsibility towards actually working on my goals. I’ve been wasting time on mindless TV when I can reading/learning. I did take a break off social media, and I’m gonna continue that into the new year so I can focus on my true goals and stop mindless scrolling.
I am calling in confidence and consistency. I am focusing on my goals and how to make them fun. I am focusing on all of the joys in every day life. I am calling in peaceful energy, and I’m letting go of anxieties about things beyond my control.
I’d say one of my biggest challenges is getting into healthy routines like working out and cooking. I never grew up eating super healthy or watching anyone prioritize health, wellness or the importance of movement. It’s something I want to do, and I have slowly been working towards.
Part of the reason this is a challenge is due to another issue I struggle with: lack of self trust. I am someone who feels better when I am in control, and I am someone who can be very hard on myself. With those things being said, I have definitely taken a diet a little too seriously in the past, and it was very unhealthy. I was losing weight and seeing results, and people around me were commenting and encouraging me- but in reality I was barely taking in 800 calories a day, and I was extremely strict with myself.
I know that if I want to be healthy, it has to be a lifestyle that I live. It can’t be something that I am tracking and counting; it can’t come from me shaming myself, it has to come from love. I want to love myself and my body enough to feed it the nutrients it truly needs and to workout regularly. I also want to trust myself to be able to make a change without becoming obsessed. Luckily I am still in therapy, and I get to see my therapist on Friday so we can discuss the goals for this new year.
I’m back to work today and then off again for a couple days, but I’m just happy to be feeling relatively healthy again! Still have some sinus congestion, but overall just feeling so much better. Also SZA dropped SOS Deluxe LANA album so I’ve been jamming to that nonstop and just enjoying the rest of 2024!
I woke up and was burning up, and not because of a fever this time. I walk out to the thermostat (that we clearly need to upgrade) and it did it’s fun thing where the batteries on it just stopped, so instead of regulating the heat, it just let it go up to 81 degrees! Can’t wait to see our next gas bill LOL.
I also had to call the vet to schedule one of our cats, because he is doing this dry heaving thing without throwing up which isn’t normal for him. Of course, he’s our problem child who has to be medicated before even going to the vet because he howls and screams like a wild animal and scares all the other animals. They can’t get him in until Monday so I am just going to try to forget about it until then. It’s honestly not fun drugging and dragging him to the vet- it’s actually pretty traumatizing for everyone with how he acts.
My other cat was throwing up this morning, but I knew it was because she got into something based on the puke. Sure enough she chewed through my husband’s bag of SunChips he left on the desk. She is obsessed with plastic and has had her fair share of expensive visits to the vet as well, so we’re just keeping an eye on her. She’s acting normal for now and honestly she likely will continue to based on past behavior- at this point I am sure she has a plastic coated stomach that is used to it.
So yeah, I’ve been awake for a whole 30 minutes and I am feeling very stressed out, but all I can do is wait for the vet (also praying they call with a cancellation for today), buy a new thermostat, and breathe.
I love that I just logged into Walmart to do a grocery pickup order and just saw how literally they have huge discounts and deals right now. Of course they do… it’s after Christmas! I’m noting this for my future- maybe some gifts are gonna be accidentally left at the north pole and come late LOL.
But anyways here’s another day in bed trying to sweat out this flu. Literally woke up in the pool of sweat- my pajamas felt like I just pulled them out of a pool. This is great, because I’m sweating out my illness, but also it makes me feel disgusting and I need to wash myself and the bedding.
I’m supposed to go back to work tomorrow, and I’m thinking I should be able to. I may tell people to just stay away from me (should be easy, I’m in the back away from people and patients), and I’ll keep a mask by if people get too close. Although the flu is hopefully gone, it feels like I may have some sort of bronchitis happening now. My husband still has a lingering cough as well, but per Google we can feel tired and have a cough for weeks after the flu! Love that for us! LOL
Overall I am glad we are in the positions we are in with work considering we already had some planned days off with the holidays. I’m glad we can still afford our bills and do grocery pickups and get what we need. I feel very blessed to have this life with my husband, and I am happy he is feeling up to working today and he’s able to do so from home!
Sending love and healing energy to all- I pray the rest of 2024 is full of peace, positivity, and love. 🤍
Writing this from my bed, because my husband has influenza A and this morning I woke up with a sore throat, body aches, and my post nasal drip trying to choke me out. I’m so very blessed to have good bosses and be in the situation we’re in. The fact that we were able to get my husband seen and diagnosed in under two hours is a blessing, and I’m just glad we’re able to rest it off and take care of ourselves.
I know this is only a couple days before Christmas, but it honestly works for us because we don’t have any Christmas plans other than stay at home! Holidays are typically pretty uneventful for us, other than the white elephant gift exchange we do with my family every January. We know that once we have children the holiday seasons will be much busier, so for now we just enjoy the peace and quiet together.
Even though I don’t feel great, I do feel very grateful🤍 Yeah, yeah, it was kinda lame, but I mean it!
finding light in the dark 