Tuesday Thoughts

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I’m overstimulated by social media right now, but can’t seem to turn away. I know my brain needs some rest though, I am going to put my phone down after this post.

I saw that Friday January 30th there is a nationwide “ice out,” where we don’t buy anything at all, and don’t go to work or school. I will go to work since I work in healthcare, but I’ll gladly skip the Dunkin’ line in the AM. I’ll grab groceries on Saturday and I just filled up my gas tank! I think it’s smart to show these huge corrupt corporations and our government how much control we do have.

I also think it would be a good idea to boycott social media that day too- I will be at least. I think it will be great to have a reset, and I imagine as a collective it could be powerful. I’m not religious, but I am spiritual, and the idea of people all sitting in collective mediation / stillness / prayer sounds incredibly powerful.

Regardless of if it’s in a collective group or not, I will continue to keep the faith and pray that love and truth will always prevail. Although I am not religious, I do find the serenity prayer to be quite comforting. I’ll hold onto that at this time, and I am sending love to all those who need a little extra.

Sunday: Soft Girl Revolution

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Some humans are caring, compassionate and kind, while (unfortunately) others lack empathy and fail to have any moral compass. The human mind is the most complex organ to exist; it has the capacity to have one believing that they themselves are “God,” while others feel so low, feeling like they are the scum of the Earth. The thing about the brain that is so wild is that whatever you believe, your brain will do everything in it’s power to confirm that belief. This miraculous organ will find evidence in your every day life to confirm whatever it is that you are focusing your energy on.

Being in America right now, there is a lot of unrest. With masked ICE agents detaining and murdering innocent people, it is extremely hard to trust any sort of government or media, but what we can trust is our intuition: none of this is right. Humans do not deserve to be ripped away from their families. Humans do not deserve to be murdered for standing up for what they believe in. Humans do not deserve to have their food, environments or algorithms poisoned with sickening, artificial sh*t. The heaviness of it all is too much for one person to hold; if we can come together with love and compassion, I believe we can see change- but it is also important that we are taking care of ourselves.

With everything going around on social media, please remember that you can be informed without having to watch the videos of people getting murdered. Yes, there are people who were there to witness it, and we are privileged to have not been there to see it, but constantly consuming this content is not helpful to our brain health. We need our brains functioning well to fight this fight, and the media knows how easy it is to keep people in an angry, fear loop. Our anger can be our friend, as it shows us where boundaries are crossed, but it also is important that we take action and make decisions with clear minds, as this is our future we are fighting for. During these times, it is important to take breaks from social media and spend quality time within your own family and community. Spreading love will do much more than the constant consuming of horrific content.

On a more “woo woo” note, astrologers have been saying that right now is the age of revolution; the last time that Pluto was in the sign of Aquarius was during the American Revolution and the French Revolution. Since Pluto has sat her happy ass back in the sign of Aquarius, it just may be time for some much needed existential shifts. I personally envision a world where people do care for people, the government minds it’s own business other than working for the people, and we have more transparency and control over where our money is going. We pay our taxes because it is illegal if we don’t, yet major government entities haven’t passed their budget audits in years, we have millions of dollars for war, our groceries are full of poison, and we are funding masked murderers in our streets? Does anyone really want this?

When we break it down, this is not about Republican vs. Democrat or Red. vs. Blue or whatever divide it is that the media is trying to sell you: this is about humanity vs. corruption. None of us want to be funding our own deaths. None of us want to be working two jobs in order to barely have enough money to put our artificial groceries on the table. None of us want to live in fear that our medication prices will suddenly sky-rocket to a point where we cannot afford to take them. None of us want to avoid medical care because we are fearful of the amount of medical debt we will accrue. None of us want to see families get ripped apart by masked, unidentified “law enforcement.” None of us want to pay more attention to screen than our own families, friends and loved ones. None of us want to live in a constant state of fear and anger, and none of us deserve it.

I am not a teacher, nor a scientist. I am not a congressman, nor a judge. I am not a policeman, nor an FBI agent. I am not a governor, nor am I on any board of anything. I am not an influencer, nor am I a celebrity. I am not someone who is known: I am just like you. I am a human being who is upset and overwhelmed by the state of the world just looking for some way to connect and create authentic conversation. Humans are the most complex, resilient beings, and although I do often feel “too soft for all of it,” I do know that I cannot remain silent/complacent as I am not in agreeance with what is happening. Like the great Martin Luther King Jr, said: “There comes a time when one must take a position that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular, but he must take it because conscience tells him it is right.”

So to all my softies who struggle when it comes to going to protests and interacting with social media, just know that you can still make a difference. Even if it just means taking time to write and reflect about what is happening, or it’s starting to research when the local primaries are and who is on the ballots, that is enough. Focusing on your local communities, even your own home, is where revolutions can start. We are in a country built on moving fast, getting money, and hustling our lives away, but that is not in our nature as mammals. I think it is important that we take time to reconnect with ourselves and with nature. We need to take moments of silence to calm our nervous systems. We need to practice mindfulness in moments of overwhelm, as that will become our superpower during these times of unrest. We have to be able to emotionally regulate and think clearly to make the changes that are truly needed, and that starts right in your own home; we can be the change we need to see in this world, one step at a time.

Stressing and Blessings

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I had quite an overwhelming day at work, and when I got home it was a bit chaotic with bringing in the groceries while urgently having to use the bathroom. I am also a week out from my period so I’m starting my PMS moodiness and I’m just super stressed and exhausted. To be honest, it really felt like everything was too much.

My husband knows I’ve been stressed at work and he also saw how overstimulated I was. I was starting to unpack the groceries and he stopped me. He asked for a hug and held me, but honestly I was kind of being a jerk and wasn’t fully participating in this hug the way I normally would- I was sulking and just limp while he held me.

He told me to take off my shoes and go get out of my work clothes, but before he let me go change, he asked if I could give him a real hug, which I did this time. He thanked me and again instructed that I go get in some comfortable clothing and sit down for a bit. He also mentioned that our cat decided to take a “soupy poop” on our bed and that he was going to clean that up after he put away the groceries.

Although he told me that our cat decided to basically diarrhea on our bed, my brain was so frazzled and probably in freeze that it didn’t fully process. So of course I went into our bedroom and plopped down on the bed and ended up putting my arm right in nasty ass cat shit.

Yup. First every motherf*cking company in America changed which dental insurance they are offering to their employees keeping me busy as hell, but now this?! CAT SHIT ON MY ARM?! What a day, right? As expected, I fully crashed tf out: I screamed out loud to myself that I was a “FUCKING IDIOT” and ran to the bathroom to burn my arm off with scolding hot water and antibacterial soap.

My husband of course hears all of this commotion and asked what happened from the other room, to which I yelled: “I JUST LAID IN THE CAT SHIT” like the a demure girly I am. He came in the room as I was drying my arm off and asked me if I could please sit down while gently reminding me that I’m doing that thing where if I don’t stop, things are going to keep going wrong and getting worse. Arguably, he was correct: I really just needed to sit down…preferably not in feces.

He sat on our little, old bedroom couch with me and told me not to worry about cleaning the bed or putting away the groceries and to just stay put and re-center. He went to finish putting all of the food away, and I actually I did what he said. I sat. I got angry. I punched the air. I shook my body to try to get the anger out. I cried. I cried harder. I stopped to re-focus on my breath. Felt like I might puke. Didn’t puke. Cried more. Started softening my breathing again. Let my head lean into the big pillow I was holding onto. Let more tears fall. They stopped falling. I relaxed.

After actually sitting through probably five minutes of just letting my emotions rise and fall, I felt so much relief. My body felt less tense and much lighter, although still pretty exhausted as expected. My husband came back in to check on me and we just talked calmly about work and what I can/can’t control and when we were interrupted by the alarm to give our diabetic cat her insulin, he told me to go jump in the shower and he’d take care of her.

Now, I just need to take a moment to say; BLESS THIS MAN AND HIS ENTIRE SOUL. Don’t get me wrong, I literally always feel that way about him (that’s why tf I married him, duh), but in this moment after this wild ass day, I couldn’t help but feel so grateful for him and our marriage.

When I was a kid and I’d have reactions or loud emotions, I was called dramatic and shamed for them; my husband has never done that to me. Unfortunately, I actually still do that to myself sometimes, which is another reason why this moment felt so important: I actually let myself have all of my emotions with no judgement.

My husband has always loved me and been there for me through the best and worst times of my life over the last 14 years. I have never felt his love waiver, I have always felt respected, and I am truly so lucky and grateful to have such a wonderful human as my life partner. It’s so easy for me to love him, but it hadn’t always been easy to love myself. Over the years, his love for me has shown me that I am easy to love, and deserving of it, just for being me, and for that I am forever thankful.

Friday Vibes

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Thank goodness it’s Friday! I am so tired, but just knowing I only have to get through today and it’s the weekend again is keeping me motivated. It’s the beginning of the year so I’ll be verifying lots of new insurances, but I will also be keeping in mind that I am only one human, and there’s no reason to stress when there’s only so much I can do.

Things are falling into place at work and I’m hoping by the end of first quarter we will have some great strides with our new front desk lead, aka my old manager! She’s only been at the office two days and I can tell how good this is gonna be- just gotta be patient per usual!

I hope everyone has a great Friday and upcoming weekend!

Christmas Eve 2025- Reflection

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The sun is shining through the sliding glass door across the room as I type this at my standing desk. It is Christmas eve, and although most may be wishing for a white Christmas, I am grateful that we are not getting any snow this year. This is definitely a selfish wish simply because my husband and I are taking a little mini-Christmas vacation tomorrow and we have to drive a couple hours away, so I prefer to have some clean roads for the trip!

I know sometimes weird feelings come up for me during the holidays, and this year has been a little of the same, but also a little different. Sometimes I find myself playing the comparison game: you know, wishing I had the huge family that got together with fun Christmas outfits and had kids running around screaming with joy. This year, I still do not have these things, but what is different is that I am just feeling at peace; I am feeling that I can fully lean into faith and know that I can trust in divine timing in my life, as it has all worked out better than I could have planned.

This holiday season, I have very close friends of mine who are pregnant, and another close friend who just welcomed her new baby to the family less than a month ago. I am absolutely overjoyed for all of them, especially because my pregnant friends have wanted to be pregnant for a long time! It also just gives me hope for my own future family planning, as sometimes I let fears creep in regarding that topic. I can’t lie, I have had moments where part of me is like “OMG I need to get pregnant now and start our family now!” but I quickly recognize that I am lost in comparison, and instead I just focus on leaning into the joy of how amazing this is for all of my friends!

We’re in the last month of the year, and I am feeling some weird closure around 2025 that feels weirdly final. I feel like I have learned a lot from repeated lessons this year, and one of the most often repeated lesson is that I should always just lean into faith over fear. I know that my thoughts and emotions can be a bit more extreme, so when I get stressed/anxious, I often catastrophize and get myself all worked up and it is always for no reason. In the end, things will work out how they are supposed to, and no matter what, I can always handle it. Life is chaotic and tragic and full of so many feelings, but it is also immensely beautiful and magical all at the same time.

As I go into 2026, I want to be my own best friend. I want to hype myself up the way that I hype my friends up and cheer them on. When my negative self-talk comes in and tries to make me feel stupid and ruminate in the failures, I know that it is just remnants of the traumatized me, and I just have to give myself love and grace. I do not hold anyone else to the insane, perfectionistic standards that I have created for myself, nor do I deserve to have that pressure on myself either. Being a perfectionist just breeds stress and tension, and I am letting go of this as I keep leaning into faith and divine timing.

2026 is a “1” year in numerology, which is looked at as a fresh reset- a true new beginning. I am all about signs from the universe and leaning into angel numbers, and I am leaning into that energy of new beginning and using it to boost my motivation! I am working on a creative project and I want to lean into that more in the new year, especially because I always feel so happy after I’ve made progress on it! It is also is a fun way for me to let go of perfectionism, and just focus on authenticity and joy.

It has been a while since I have made a longer post on here, and today felt like a great day to take some time to just reflect. It has been an interesting year, and I am excited that my husband and I are going to have a fun Christmas together and this will hopefully be the start of a new annual tradition! Sending love to everyone who needs a little extra this season, and I hope your holiday season brings you love and peace.

Monday

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Starting the day a little later than usual today because I have to bring my car to the repair shop this morning. Once I drop it off, the rental car people will bring me to Enterprise so I can get my rental for the next couple days, and then I can head to work!

We have our potluck at work today so I am bringing Poppyseed Bread per usual (highly requested family recipe), and we are picking our secret santa’s! I am looking forward to that and trying to keep a positive outlook on this week, as last week felt like a total shit show at work.

Although I am starting the week off a little bit out of routine, maybe that’s exactly what we need for this week. I’m grateful to have my car and my insurance to help pay for this repair, I am grateful for my bosses being so flexible with me while I work through this and my cat’s diabetes (her next vet appointment is this Friday), and I am just grateful to be alive even when times feel stressful.

Sending love to everyone this Monday- cheers to a great week ahead! Even if shitty things happen, we can tune into the fact that we still have many wonderful things to be grateful for.

Monday AM / Full Moon

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Happy Monday! I am feeling quite tired this morning, but I am manifesting a great day and week ahead! This weekend was nice as my husband and I got to see some friends and family, and I’m just excited that we’re in October and the fall weather is on the way!

To kick off the week, I just wanted to just start my day with some gratitude! As stressful as life can feel sometimes, I know that there is beauty all around, and I have so many blessings to be grateful for.

I am grateful that I get to wake up next to the love of my life, in our warm, comfy bed. It’s so nice to wake up and feel immediately safe and relaxed knowing that he is here with me.

I’m grateful for our home that provides security, safety, and a roof over our heads. It’s cold when it needs to be cold, and warm when it needs to be warm. We have clean, running water and we have electricity-our home is everything we need.

I am grateful that my husband and I have jobs that allow us to pay for the life we have. We can pay our bills and still enjoy having fun in life, and I’m just thankful we’re both in jobs that we don’t hate LOL.

I am grateful for our cars- I love my car and am thankful to have a reliable vehicle to get me from place to place safely. I enjoy my car and I am thankful that I can make those monthly payments, although I am also excited for the day we pay it off!

Last but not least, I am thankful for my Angels and the Universe. I am thankful that when I am in low moments, or even moments of happiness, I can find peace in knowing that I am being divinely guided and protected. I have seen so many signs and synchronicities that remind me that there is so much more than all that we see, and it is pure and beautiful. The more I step into the present moment, the more I am in tune with the Universe.

Thank you for this quiet morning.

Thank you for this beautiful week.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

September Prayers

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May September bring a calmness to your life, allowing you to slow down and be present.

May September show you that miracles can happen and there truly is magic in the world around you.

May September bring abundance and luck around every corner, surprising and inspiring your inner child.

May September allow you to soak in all that you’ve created and all that you have accomplished over the past few years.

You have evolved, and you will continue to evolve. The breakdowns have lead to breakthroughs. The hardships have strengthened your boundaries. You aren’t a never-ending project that needs fixing, you’re a unique, powerful being that deserves to love yourself in the same way that you love everyone else. May September open your eyes to that.

Happy June

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June is for giving yourself credit for all you’ve accomplished so far this year. 🙌🏼

June is for basking in the sunshine and feeling present in your everyday life. ☀️

June is for surprise miracles and abundance around every corner. ✨

June is for noticing and appreciating all of the love around you. 🤍

June is here to remind you of your true power and potential- may you be present and open to receiving all that is for you. 🥰

Sunday/New Moon 4-27-25

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Good morning! I’m so happy to see the sun shining on this gorgeous day- a day of rest and resetting. Self care is on the list today- which includes a little bit of spoiling ourselves with some pedicures today. My husband and I haven’t had pedicures since November… LOL so we’re a bit overdue. I also wanted to get one before my girls trip coming up!

I’m also gonna pick up some groceries today and do my best to have a more nutritious week than I have been having lately, because I know my body deserves to be healthy and full of vitamins and nutrients. This part is always harder for me, but I am going to focus on small wins and keep reminding myself why I am doing this.

New moons are time for new intentions, and since we are no longer in eclipse season, the energy is much calmer. Plant those seeds that you wish to grow, and take time to nourish them. No rushing, no pushing- just trusting in the divine timing of it all. I am focusing on my physical and mental health, as well as how I can be more grounded- both in nature and in my own positive energy.