Good morning! I’m so happy to see the sun shining on this gorgeous day- a day of rest and resetting. Self care is on the list today- which includes a little bit of spoiling ourselves with some pedicures today. My husband and I haven’t had pedicures since November… LOL so we’re a bit overdue. I also wanted to get one before my girls trip coming up!
I’m also gonna pick up some groceries today and do my best to have a more nutritious week than I have been having lately, because I know my body deserves to be healthy and full of vitamins and nutrients. This part is always harder for me, but I am going to focus on small wins and keep reminding myself why I am doing this.
New moons are time for new intentions, and since we are no longer in eclipse season, the energy is much calmer. Plant those seeds that you wish to grow, and take time to nourish them. No rushing, no pushing- just trusting in the divine timing of it all. I am focusing on my physical and mental health, as well as how I can be more grounded- both in nature and in my own positive energy.
Today was a good day! I had a good day at work, I got to see my therapist, and I watched a couple of episodes of Severance with my husband! I am excited for our weekend as we have a 30th birthday party to go to, we have pedicures booked, and we are getting eye exams/new glasses!
I’m also excited for the new moon on Sunday, which is the same day my husband and I are getting our pedicures. It’ll be a nice day to just relax and have some self care. I’m excited for my girls trip coming up soon, and I am just feeling a greater sense of self lately. I’m so grateful for this life and this beautiful Friday.
I didn’t record my podcast episode, and I am giving myself grace about it. I will record soon, and I know this is just my brain getting into survival mode and putting me in a freeze state. I am feeling my way through it and I see exactly where all this fear is stemming from.
As a child my father would often tell me that I had no voice. He’d remind me that I had zero power or control in the home, because I was just the child. Also, being a child of alcoholics, I kept that part of my life a secret from everyone outside of the house (except for a couple close friends as I got older). I was always keeping quiet as a way to be safe, so my brain automatically shut down when I went to start recording my podcast episode.
I am working through this feeling, reminding myself that I am allowed to have a voice. All I have to do is speak the truth and remember my intentions. People will judge regardless, and that is not my business or my problem. I know my intentions and I know who I am- that is all that matters. I am not putting a harsh timeline on this, but I am determined to start recording this year!
I am not a religious person, so I did not go to church this morning. I haven’t been to church since I was a small child, and I vividly remember vomiting while singing hymns and my uncle telling me that the devil came out of me that day. So that’s my experience with religion, plus lots of veggie tales. My parents were religious when I was younger, they apparently even had bible study nights with their friends and they said I was there for those too as a toddler. Of course I do not remember this.
As an adult I’ve been on my own spiritual journey, and I very much believe in a higher power. I do speak to my angels and guides, I see signs and synchronicities often, but I still struggle with the word/name “God.” I think it is because when I picture this higher power, I do not see it as one entity. If anything I feel most comfortable saying “source,” because I see it all as a big, beautiful light and we all have this light inside of us. So if there is one “entity,” it’s our collective as a whole.
How I see the world is that we all have the light and the dark. Some people have more darkness within them, stemming from wounds and traumas they’ve experienced or been passed down from previous generations, and some have more light as they’ve worked through their traumas and found community to help support them. The more that the light workers shine, the more they can help others to shine through their own darkness.
Today, let’s spread our light to everyone. Smile at strangers, let people in during traffic, practice patience in moments when you feel aggravated, and just focus on the gratitude and blessings all around you. I feel so lucky to be alive today, and I am grateful to be able to spend time with my husband and just enjoy this day of rest.
Ten years from now I’ll be 39. I see myself and my husband with two children, living in a new, single family home with a yard. The kids are in school, youngest just in preschool or kindergarten, so I’m returning to a more full time work schedule. Whether that is still in dental or at one of my children’s schools to get help with tuition assistance (if we decide to go private), I know I’ll be happy either way.
I see us being creative at home, having the kids help with tasks like cooking simply because they think it’s fun to be helpful. I see finger-painting days, as well as days where we make messes with shaving cream with food coloring. I see movie nights with an assortment of different popcorns and snacks. I see more time at the parks and the pools when it’s nice out, and lots of sledding and snowman building in the winter.
Life looks busy, yet also slow. I see less technology usage for myself, except when it comes to work or helping the kids with school. Oh, and of course we will have our Mario Kart nights so we need our technology for that! I’m still blogging, and I am finally good at being intentional with my mornings, as I’ve learned that getting alone time is still a huge priority.
My husband and I still get our solo breakfast dates at least once a month, but usually twice since both sets of grandparents love spending Saturday mornings with the kids. Our anniversary is celebrated in the house as our “family birthday,” and our kids grow up seeing what real, healthy love looks like. Ten years from now looks pretty good to me.
I am feeling so refreshed and recharged, and I am finally at the end of my recovery! I still have minor pain where my tonsils were, and still dealing with the post-nasal phlegm from the nasal turbinate reduction, but it is sooooo much better than I was a few days ago. I’m sure me singing at the top of my lungs and talking all day is contributing to the pain, but I have been resting my voice and body for over a week and I needed to release-and what better time than the full moon?
I am feeling so grateful to have gotten through this recovery, because that sh*t was no joke. The doctor warned me that I would be in a lot of pain for a while, but I was really thinking I had a high pain tolerance and that I would be a champ… LOL no. If you can get your tonsils out as a child, do that, because it is rough as hell as an adult. To be fair though, a week out of my entire life is just a tiny blip, and it is so worth it in the long run. I am just glad this is behind me, and now I can live normally again! Well, I am still avoiding crunchy/hard foods right now so I don’t irritate the area while it is still healing, but it nice to be able to eat some solid foods now.
Today my husband and I were invited to our friends place for a poker day/night, and I decided to stay home since I knew I couldn’t have any of their snacks LOL. Also, I did not want to play, nor did I want to sit and watch everyone else play. My friend and I got on Facetime for a couple hours which was nice, especially since I really haven’t been talking to anyone since my surgery last Thursday! Her and I are going to visit our friend in North Dakota for her 30th birthday next month, so we are getting excited for that!
Overall, I am feeling happy. I’m happy to be out of pain. I’m happy to have great friends and an even better husband (sorry not sorry friends, he is always gonna be my #1). I am happy that I have a job that I actually enjoy to return to on Monday. I am happy that we have good health insurance. I am happy that I can sing along to my favorite songs again. I am happy that I can go on a breakfast date with my love tomorrow. I am just happy, and I am so grateful to be able to feel into my happiness.
Feeling blessed and feeling pain- but overall all is well. I have been lacking a little sleep, but as the pain goes down, I’m sure I’ll be able to sleep better than ever! I am making sure to take the medications as directed to manage the pain as well, I’m just hoping it continues to go down.
My mouth is insanely dry right now for a couple reasons. One is I have to breathe through my mouth right now since my nose has packing in it (I start to rinse that out today). The other reason is because they have me a nausea patch the wear so I didn’t get sick after the anesthesia and pain meds, and they told me in can make my mouth and eyes very dry.
I can leave the patch on for a couple more days and honestly I want to because I usually get nauseous and I’d rather not feel like I’m going to puke while I’m also in pain. As much as the dry mouth sucks, I’ll just keep sipping my iced water.
I am just grateful for cuddles with my husband and my cats while I heal. I am falling back asleep as I write this, so I’m going to listen to my body and go back to bed. I hope everyone has a great Friday and upcoming weekend. 🤍
my baby girl Sky aka the birthday girl!! happy 10th birthday to my senior kitty.
Feeling peaceful and blessed today! Today is my last day of dance for a few weeks since I’m nine days out from my tonsillectomy! I’m excited to end on a high note and I am just proud of myself for doing something out of my comfort zone and committing for a whole month!
This week is going to be to be super productive at work while I get ahead and tie up loose ends on claims so that it isn’t too hard for the girls when I’m gone. It can get hard when I am the only one who is full time in my position, but we all can only do what we can! I’m just happy I have a great team and great bosses.
This may be a weird thing to say, but I feel like I am on the cusp of something great. My body has been resting and I’ve just been feeling really present and grounded- I just have good feelings about these upcoming months. I’m trusting in all of the signs I’ve been seeing (222 and 111 come up A LOT for me lately), and I’m having faith in my angels and guides.
I felt like I was getting so much sleep this morning that I actually slept through the entire day and I was going to wake up to my Monday morning alarm for work. Needless to say, that did not happen and for that I am thankful. It did feel nice to get a lot of sleep-I’ve been feeling the need to rest and reset lately so I am embracing this slow weekend and season in my life.
I decided to make myself a new Tumblr page yesterday. When I was younger, Tumblr was my first blog. It is mainly photos and you can post your own and/or “re-blog” from others, but it always felt so therapeutic to me. I had been messing around with a few settings here on WordPress and just kept thinking about how much I missed having a photo-blog (aka Tumblr)-so I decided to sign up and create a new one! If you want to check it out you can at https://themagicshecreates.tumblr.com/
I have this thought that comes back every now and again about how us humans feel the need to be in the loop on every tragedy happening around the globe, yet we aren’t even present to our own health and financial goals. How are we going to save the world or solve any problems when we are struggling to survive ourselves?
People scream at other people on the internet calling them privileged for ignoring the horrific news, when there are tons of people who are informed but aren’t doing anything about it. For example, my mom is always complaining about politics and whatever but she doesn’t write letters to representatives or do anything productive with that information. Also, how informed is anyone when the news/media is profiting of your anxieties and fears?
The only reason to be on the internet is to spread true authentic love and light. I have such a love/hate relationship with Instagram, which is why I am happy I signed back up for tumblr, where people aren’t commenting and going back and forth-we are all just sharing art. I also like the app Lapse for this reason as well. I am going to end up taking time back off Instagram again, which always makes me feel better mentally.
Today is going to be a peaceful Sunday, and I am just soaking in all of the blessings around me. I am grateful to have a warm home and roof over my head. I am grateful to have an incredible life partner who loves and respects me. I am grateful to have friends who encourage me and are rooting for me. I am grateful that my husband and I have our jobs so we are able to pay our bills and have fun in this life we have built together. Finally, I am thankful for my angels and guides who keep me divinely protected and blessed- thank you, thank you, thank you!
Today was much needed. My husband and I got to sleep in, so we went out for breakfast at 1pm! Once we got home I kept my promise to myself and made us green juice for the week, as well as some ginger shots! I also did a little bit of vision board journaling.
This morning I was actually crying tears of joy, and it was all because I was truly just feeling into the love and joy in my life. I used to feel so riddled with anxiety to the point that I never could just be in the present moment, and now that I catch myself consciously feeling joy, I’ve been trying to really lean into that feeling and giving it space.
Life is full of struggles and hardships, but the love that we have in our lives is what makes it possible to survive. Lean into the love around you, and remember to recognize how truly blessed you are. Sending extra love to everyone this Sunday!
finding light in the dark 