Today I went inside Dunkin’ to order coffee, because the drive thru line was insane. Once I was inside I was able to order right away and went over to the pick up area to wait for my drinks. The cold brew for my fiancé came out quickly, and then I was just waiting on my iced coffee. A line of people start forming by me as they are also awaiting their orders, and the start minutes going by. Turns out they had run out of iced coffee, so they were working on making another batch. The beeping of the machines was so loud and felt never-ending, and the staff was all moving around quickly doing each of their duties as best as they could with the circumstances.
As I was sitting there, I started thinking about the experience as a metaphor for life. Being in that restaurant, as overstimulating as it was, was really just showing me the art of patience and mastering our own minds. Whether the employees decide to get frustrated or customers decide to get angry, nothing was going to change. Yelling and being upset is not going to make the iced coffee come faster. Giving up and throwing in the towel was not going to stop the mobile orders receipts from piling up. As much as it can feel like “when it rains, it pours,” how we shift our mindset and process our emotions is key.
There is so much external sh*t in our lives that we cannot control. The more time we spend trying to control our external environment, the more we are ignoring our inner world. Instead of focusing on how long the wait is or why the staff didn’t make iced coffee “fast enough,” why not focus on the fact that you are still having your iced coffee made for you. Why not focus on the fact that you’re lucky enough to not be behind that counter with the stress of having customers scream around you for things you’re actively trying to fix. When we focus on what is within our control (aka our mindset/perspective) we can become less rigid and overwhelmed by life.
There are things in life that you truly can never prepare for. Things like becoming a parent, having a parent pass away, witnessing an unexpected tragedy- these are beyond our control, yet we still have to live with the results. Life will continue to throw challenges our way, which is why mental health and emotional wellbeing are so important. The more we understand ourselves and how we process certain things, the more we can support ourselves during the journey of life.
Being able to have a more positive perspective or being able to lean into faith and letting go allows for less tension and suffering in our minds and bodies. Worrying about things beyond our control only fuels fear and robs us of the peace and joy we can find in the present moment. I have been actively trying to be more present in my life, and I know that there is so much comfort in stepping back and getting out of survival mode.
I could have become irritable and impatient waiting for my iced coffee, and I could have even used the excuse of all of the chaos that ensued in my life over this past week, but what was that going to do for me? Encourage my misery? Allow me to stay in a victim mentality? Instead I tapped into this “life imitates art” moment and recognized the metaphor in front of me. There is peace in letting go- whether it’s letting go of expectations, outcomes, or the need to control the situations around you, you’ll find that there is a feeling of content that washes over you when you stop and just be.
finding light in the dark 