self love

Sunday Card Pull

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Deck: Gabby Bernstein’s “The Universe Has Your Back”

Take a moment to tune into the energy of love. When is a time where you felt the warmth in your heart? A time where your cheeks hurt because you couldn’t stop smiling? Was it during the holidays? At a concert? On a hike? Tap into that feeling, and sit with it. Let that feeling wash over your entire body, from your crown to your toes. Soak it in so deeply that you take this loving energy with you today, spreading it to any and all who come your way.

The world always needs more love, start with yourself. 💖

Favorite Time of Day

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What’s your favorite time of day?

Lately I’ve been loving evenings, because that’s when I get to cuddle up with my fiancé and watch Game of Thrones together. This is my first time watching it, and I’m really enjoying it! I had tried to watch it with him years ago, but I just couldn’t get into it- now we’re almost done with season six!

I also enjoy mornings when I don’t have to go to work. For example, right now it’s 6:51am and I have nowhere to be today. I get to lay in bed and write in my blog, while listening to this YouTube fireplace I had originally put on to fall asleep. Peaceful mornings like these are also quite enjoyable.

Releasing / Accepting

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I release any tension stored within my shoulders and hips, letting go of the traumas that wish to stay buried within me.

I release any shame that my inner child carries, letting go of hurtful words and beliefs that were never mine to hold onto.

I release the limiting beliefs that float around in my brain, letting go of perfectionism and fears that only hinder me from following my dreams.

I accept and am open to the loving support from the universe, please allow me to be a light in this world.

I accept and am open to the abundance that is waiting for me, please allow me to make room for the gifts that are meant for me.

I accept and am open to peace and harmony, please allow me to release any blockages that are keeping me from that state of mind.

I am so grateful to be here healing and growing. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Sunday 8/18

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I feel like I haven’t really sat down to write an actual long blog post in a while. I guess I could go back and look, and maybe this just feels different because I am writing this on my laptop, rather than my phone. Regardless, I am just happy to write and happy with this season of my life. I feel so supported by loved ones around me, and it has been such a beautiful year. It is crazy to think that in just 6 weeks, I will be marrying the love of my life!

Whenever I visualize seeing him at the end of the aisle and up at the alter, I cannot help but feel so warm and full of pure joy. We have been building this foundation for many years- I mean, we’re getting married on our 13th anniversary! I feel so grateful to have such a loving, respectful man as my life partner. I have been seeing so many signs that feel like direct support from the divine, and I am so thankful for all of the love we have received from friends and family.

This year also has felt very transformative for me and for my relationships. I have been able to overcome fears and have difficult conversations that have only strengthened the connections. Me hiding my true feelings or staying quiet when I feel uncomfortable was not good for anyone. I always thought it was better to keep the peace and not try to question anyone’s opinions or actions when I was confused or felt differently, but that was creating inauthenticity within the friendship.

I feel that if you truly want a healthy relationship with another person, whether platonic or romantic, you have to be honest with yourself and each other. For me, leaning into authenticity is one of the best ways to do this. Saying what you need to say with love and good intentions, even if it means feelings could come up, is better than holding in all of your true thoughts and basically pretending to be okay with everything. Any relationship you lose from being authentic isn’t a loss; we deserve to be surrounded with people who love us for who we are.

For years I made sure everyone around me always felt at ease or as comfortable as possible, putting their own needs before my own, and now I vow to live a life where I take into account my own comfort level. I am allowed to speak up when uncomfortable. I am allowed to say “no” when my normal reaction would be to say “yes” out of obligation. I owe it to myself and to my inner child to trust my own instincts and to set boundaries where needed. I am an empathetic person, but I recently read a quote that said: “empathy without boundaries is self-sabotage.”

Honestly, I am feeling quite excited for what the future holds, and I am eager to continue leaning into authenticity and be proud of who I am, as I am. The more I pay attention to my emotions and my triggers, the more I learn about myself and what I need and what aids in my inner peace. Knowing what I need allows me to do those things for myself, but also communicate with loved ones when I need to set certain boundaries. I am the one who is guaranteed to be with me until my soul leaves this Earth, and I deserve to give myself peace and love during this lifetime.

1:11

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I’ve been seeing 111 a lot over the last couple weeks. In angel numbers this can symbolize both new beginnings and also trusting one’s intuition. I’m leaning into this energy and trusting that all is well and good things are happening for me. I’m so grateful for these signs and for the support I have from my loved ones on the other side. 🤍✨

Prompt:

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What profession do you admire most and why?

I’d have to say I greatly admire psychologists/therapists who genuinely care about their patients.

I admire the ones who will fight back against the system that is constantly pushing to medicate every single person immediately, and focuses on alternative options first when it is appropriate.

I admire the ones who will refer patients to other therapists if they notice that the patient is not seeming to be fully open or comfortable and could benefit from seeing a colleague of theirs.

I admire the ones who entered this profession with the goal of helping others reach their full potential, while also having the desire to improve society as a whole when it comes to mental health and wellbeing.

I admire the ones who are compassionate and and empathetic-the ones who truly care for others, rather than someone who just shows up for a paycheck.

A huge thank you to all the mental health professionals who are helping their patients have a stronger sense of compassion towards themselves, as well as helping them create a happy and healthy future.

8:8 Lion’s Gate Portal

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With these words, I cleanse my mind, body and soul of all negativity and limiting beliefs that are blocking me from my full potential. I call my energy back to me, purified and wrapped in abundance, allowing me to feel refreshed and recharged. This life is worth living, not just being a fearful bystander; I am deserving of a peaceful, fulfilling life.

I am so grateful for this life I have. I am marrying the love of my life: my high school sweetheart. Literally the dreams I had as a teenager are coming to fruition, and I have been living the dreams for so many years now. I am blessed that I wake up next to him every day in our comfortable bed. We are so lucky to have our home together, along with our three beautiful cats. Mushu is actually laying on me as I type this right now.

I am grateful to be in a great work environment after so many years of toxic bosses and coworkers. I actually enjoy going to work and am happy with the owners, and I feel like I am meant to be there. I am happy that I am appreciated- I was even given a surprise raise after five months of being at this office! I am just feeling so very blessed to have this job.

I am grateful to have so many good friends, and also for the fact that I still have a lot of my family around. I have clothes to wear and food in my fridge. The lights are on and the water is running, and the bills are paid. This life is beautiful and abundant- and I am forever grateful for it. I am grateful to have worked on my mental health enough to be present for these blessings around me. I am grateful to be supported and guided by my angels; by source.

Channeled Message: We are all the sun, the moon, and the stars. We are all living and breathing and ever-changing beings, all with the same energy of love within us. For some it is buried beneath trauma. For some it is buried beneath ego. For some it may feel like it does not exist, but it does. We are all love and light, and the sooner we tap into it, the better the world will be.

Sunday July 28, 2024

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I have been feeling so present in my life lately, which has also been making me cry a lot LOL. I have been really in my feelings about the wedding, and I find myself visualizing us just beaming at each other at the alter and the tears just start flowing. I’ve dreamt of marrying this man for so many years, and it’s finally coming to fruition. We’re just over two months away from the special day, and I’m just soaking in this lovely time.

I also am about to go on a girls trip with a couple of my close friends from high school! We are seeing the gorgeous, witchy rap goddess herself: Qveen Herby!!! I am so stoked to see her live. I just discovered her music a couple of years ago and I just love listening to an independent artist who shares her healing transformation through her art. She’s not ashamed of who she was or is, she is just filling embracing her truest self; I feel like this concert is going to have the most immaculate energy. We’re also celebrating my birthday on this trip; I’m so excited to start off my last year in my 20s with my best friends!!

Aside from all of the upcoming events, I also recently had a great breakdown/breakthrough within myself and with another close friend of mine. Without going too much into detail, there was an event that triggered me that I could not ignore, and because I had ignored many other triggers throughout the years of our relationship, all of those memories came flooding through. Although the start of the interaction wasn’t how I exactly planned, I am positive that it was all supposed to happen this way, and I am glad that it did.

We were able to sit down in person, not once, but twice for a couple of difficult conversations. We are both people who grew up without seeing healthy conflict resolution, so we both were super anxious going into these discussions, even with our significant others joining us. There were heated moments, but no one got disrespectful or rude, which was honestly relieving and appreciated. I always have to think of worst case scenarios, so I was pleasantly surprised when this all ended on high notes.

Overall, now I feel I can have clear, authentic communication with my friend, when in reality I didn’t always feel that way before. As I’ve talked about many times in this blog, I am a recovering people-pleaser, and with that I have had to realize how much of a disservice I have been giving my friendships by not being open and honest when I’m feeling bothered by something. I swept things under the rug because it felt easier than facing conflict, especially when my mind always goes to the worst possible case scenario- but this only harmed myself and my friendships.

They had no clue I was bothered, I built up resentment that I could easily push away, but in reality we will end up getting triggered again and then all of the things we “pushed away,” just resurface. Until we address and resolve our issues, the cycles will continue to repeat. This time around, I did not want that to continue. No matter how difficult a conversation may be, I have to stay true to myself. I deserve to feel authentic and comfortable in my life and my relationships, so it’s up to me to be honest with myself and with those I love.

I am feeling so good this season. Astrologically it makes sense considering it is now Leo season and your girl here is a Leo herself! Leo sun, and rising here, and I am finally leaning into my confidence and my authenticity. I am so proud of myself for all of the work I’ve been doing for my mental health, and I am excited to see how much I grow over this next year. Thank you, thank you, thank you. 🤍✨

How Would I Describe Myself to Someone?

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How would you describe yourself to someone?

I’m a complex human woman who feels everything very deeply: the pains and the joys all hit my brain, body and heart intensely.

I’m someone who craves genuine connection and gets overjoyed by the smallest synchronicities in life; yet I’m also someone who craves alone time, just chilling in my home in the presence of my fiancé and my cats.

I’m someone who cares deeply and is always rooting for everyone to be well-loved and happy. I want the best for everyone, including myself.

I’m a sensitive person with a variety of opinions that I cannot attach myself to as I am aware that we are ever evolving. I am someone who feels that living with an open mind and being empathetic is what humanity truly needs.

I laugh a lot. I cry a lot, luckily lately it has been tears of joy. I love the idea of healing and growing into the person I’ve always needed, and supporting others on their own journeys.