30 Things: Happiness Edition

blog

List 30 things that make you happy.

1. my fiancé (not sure he counts as he isn’t a thing, but he sure makes me happy)

2. my cats (also not things, but I love them so much)

3. iced coffee

4. comfy clothes

5. candles

6. sunshine/sunrises/sunsets

7. good music (qveen herby always elevates the vibe)

8. clear night skies

9. the moon

10. podcasts

11. cute nails

12. good hair days

13. synchronicities

14. angel numbers

15. fuzzy slippers

16. the beach

17. nature walks

18. rollerblading

19. good books

20. netflix reality tv shows (selling sunset, perfect match, love is blind, etc)

21. singing/dancing

22. vacation

23. family time

24. connecting w/ good friends

25. ice cream

26. going on the water (boats, paddle boarding, tubing, etc)

27. balloons

28. mimosas

29. christmas lights/ string lights

30. smoothies

Happy August

blog

May August be the refresh and reset I need to get into healthier habits and routines.

May August bring abundance, joy, and peace to my life.

May August show me how good life can be when I fully step into my authentic self and live in alignment with my goals.

May August be a transformative month, and may everything that happens be only for the greatest good.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Sunday July 28, 2024

blog

I have been feeling so present in my life lately, which has also been making me cry a lot LOL. I have been really in my feelings about the wedding, and I find myself visualizing us just beaming at each other at the alter and the tears just start flowing. I’ve dreamt of marrying this man for so many years, and it’s finally coming to fruition. We’re just over two months away from the special day, and I’m just soaking in this lovely time.

I also am about to go on a girls trip with a couple of my close friends from high school! We are seeing the gorgeous, witchy rap goddess herself: Qveen Herby!!! I am so stoked to see her live. I just discovered her music a couple of years ago and I just love listening to an independent artist who shares her healing transformation through her art. She’s not ashamed of who she was or is, she is just filling embracing her truest self; I feel like this concert is going to have the most immaculate energy. We’re also celebrating my birthday on this trip; I’m so excited to start off my last year in my 20s with my best friends!!

Aside from all of the upcoming events, I also recently had a great breakdown/breakthrough within myself and with another close friend of mine. Without going too much into detail, there was an event that triggered me that I could not ignore, and because I had ignored many other triggers throughout the years of our relationship, all of those memories came flooding through. Although the start of the interaction wasn’t how I exactly planned, I am positive that it was all supposed to happen this way, and I am glad that it did.

We were able to sit down in person, not once, but twice for a couple of difficult conversations. We are both people who grew up without seeing healthy conflict resolution, so we both were super anxious going into these discussions, even with our significant others joining us. There were heated moments, but no one got disrespectful or rude, which was honestly relieving and appreciated. I always have to think of worst case scenarios, so I was pleasantly surprised when this all ended on high notes.

Overall, now I feel I can have clear, authentic communication with my friend, when in reality I didn’t always feel that way before. As I’ve talked about many times in this blog, I am a recovering people-pleaser, and with that I have had to realize how much of a disservice I have been giving my friendships by not being open and honest when I’m feeling bothered by something. I swept things under the rug because it felt easier than facing conflict, especially when my mind always goes to the worst possible case scenario- but this only harmed myself and my friendships.

They had no clue I was bothered, I built up resentment that I could easily push away, but in reality we will end up getting triggered again and then all of the things we “pushed away,” just resurface. Until we address and resolve our issues, the cycles will continue to repeat. This time around, I did not want that to continue. No matter how difficult a conversation may be, I have to stay true to myself. I deserve to feel authentic and comfortable in my life and my relationships, so it’s up to me to be honest with myself and with those I love.

I am feeling so good this season. Astrologically it makes sense considering it is now Leo season and your girl here is a Leo herself! Leo sun, and rising here, and I am finally leaning into my confidence and my authenticity. I am so proud of myself for all of the work I’ve been doing for my mental health, and I am excited to see how much I grow over this next year. Thank you, thank you, thank you. 🤍✨

How Would I Describe Myself to Someone?

blog

How would you describe yourself to someone?

I’m a complex human woman who feels everything very deeply: the pains and the joys all hit my brain, body and heart intensely.

I’m someone who craves genuine connection and gets overjoyed by the smallest synchronicities in life; yet I’m also someone who craves alone time, just chilling in my home in the presence of my fiancé and my cats.

I’m someone who cares deeply and is always rooting for everyone to be well-loved and happy. I want the best for everyone, including myself.

I’m a sensitive person with a variety of opinions that I cannot attach myself to as I am aware that we are ever evolving. I am someone who feels that living with an open mind and being empathetic is what humanity truly needs.

I laugh a lot. I cry a lot, luckily lately it has been tears of joy. I love the idea of healing and growing into the person I’ve always needed, and supporting others on their own journeys.

Full Moon Post

blog

I am so proud of myself for having hard conversations and speaking up even when it was uncomfortable. I am proud of putting my healing and goals ahead of my feelings, and actually stepping into my authentic self. I am proud of how dedicated I have been to the things I care most about: my relationship with my life partner, and my mental health. I can trust myself to follow through, and I can trust that I can get through anything. I choose faith over fear and I prioritize peace and love.

This full moon, I release any negative thoughts and self doubt that is limiting me from reaching my goals. I release the fears and worries that reside in my mind, as they were never mind to hold onto. I release the need for approval and for perfection, as I have had everything I’ve needed within me all along. I release what is no longer serving me or my authentic self, and I step into the person I am meant to be.

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you 🌕✨

Cats

blog

Dogs or cats?

I’ve had cats my entire life, and my fiancé and I have three right now. We have thought about maybe having a dog in the future, but we’d prefer to have a large yard. Cats are waaaayyyy more low maintenance than dogs considering you don’t have to walk them outside, and when we have people come watch them, they don’t even technically have to come every day as long as the food and water is full! Cleaning litter definitely sucks, but also walking around and picking up poop outside doesn’t seem much better LOL.

idk

blog

My mind has been a bit chaotic the past week. Lots of triggers and emotions and realizations. Breakdowns lead to breakthroughs though, so I’m just having faith that all will work out for the best and how it should.

Choose Wisely

blog

What is sacred anymore?

What is intimate?

What is worth keeping in private?

Where is the discernment?

Does anyone keep anything to themselves anymore? To their closest loved ones?

Does anyone value having anything that is theirs, and only theirs?

Does every envious and evil eye have the right to see your most precious moments?

Does every judgmental person deserve your energy and attention?

Does everyone in your digital friends list meet the requirements to actually be a part of your life? To come into your home? To watch your kids?

Does every horny individual on your feed deserve to see your naked body? To look at you as an object? To assume you did this all for them?

Are the views and the likes worth it? The followers and possibility of going viral?

Does the external validation go far? Could you give yourself that validation without getting it from someone else?

Would you still like your posts if it was only for you and your loved ones? Would you be proud of your children doing and posting the same content?

In the worlds of real life and “reel” life, are you living in your values in both? Are you the same person both on and offline?

Everything in life is temporary, yet the content we post to the internet remains forever. It has become to normal to share every aspect of our lives online to both people we know and complete strangers… but just because something is normal, doesn’t mean it’s good.

In an age of being so “connected” through apps and technology, we are so far disconnected from ourselves.

We’ve become addicted to external validation to feed our unhealed wounds of unworthiness.

We’ve become addicted to the dopamine rush when we get a lot of views or engagement.

We’ve become addicted to our screens and “connecting” with others, while ignoring the real world around us.

And we can run around and say it isn’t our fault and blame everyone else, but it’s our responsibility now. We know now.

So sit with yourself, and ask:

What do you value most in this life? Are you living in your values?

What are you grateful for? Have you thought about how many blessings are around you on a daily basis?

What habits are you wishing to let go of? What habits have you been wanting to develop?

What do you do when you’re avoiding something else? Is this beneficial to you in anyway? Is this something you wish to continue?

We all get a little lost sometimes, but the important part is that we come back home to ourselves over and over again.

None of us get out of here alive. We deserve to live lives that we are proud of. We deserve lives that we will be grateful to look back on when we’re lying peacefully on our deathbeds.

You are in charge of you.

You get to decide who has access to your mind, to your body, and to your soul.

You get one life to live, and you are the one who chooses who and what you give your energy to.

Choose wisely.

Future

blog

What are you most excited about for the future?

When I look forward into the future, I’d have to say I’m most excited to start a family with my fiancé. I can imagine watching him transition into being a father and seeing how wonderful he will be with our kids. I see pajama dance parties and fun holiday traditions, all while having my favorite person on my team. As much as I look forward to those days, I am also happy to be exactly where we are. Right now we are enjoying our wedding season and the time that we have to dedicate solely to each other, prior to bringing children into this world.