feminine

Grateful AM

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Grateful for music, especially the kind that gives me goosebumps and brings tears to my eyes.

Grateful for my husband, especially his kisses and his laugh. Not to mention his patience, determination, intelligence and work ethic. There’s a lot I love about this man.

Grateful for coffee, especially some iced coffee w cream from Dunkin’.

Grateful for my car, especially the fact that she keeps me safe and has a cute pink steering wheel cover.

Grateful for my job, especially the fact that I’m not micromanaged.

Random Thoughts

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I feel like we all need to start re-centering and re-grounding ourselves. We all need to learn how to feel our emotions, instead of shoving them away.

I’m actually pretty sad that I get anxious to go on walks by my house. I cried about it the other day- but to be fair, I’m also on my period. I’ve just had a couple bad experiences, like 1. watching a dog get hit by a car and 2. some guy was going to try to kidnap me. oh.. and 3. a creepy coworker of mine showed up to my house unannounced while I was on a walk. Needless to say, I don’t really feel calm on my walks- I’m typically on high alert.

I selfishly hate that my cat has diabetes. It’s so hard for my husband and I to take vacations because she has to have her insulin twice a day, and she’s did horrible when she had an 8 hour stay at the vet, so she can’t really be put in a kitty hotel for long. I don’t want to fly her anywhere and driving her in a car for hours would also stress her out so it’s just all annoying as shit.

I am tired of patients yelling at me when aim trying to help them. You can’t really yell at me about your insurance policy- you signed up for it, not me. I didn’t write in the frequencies or downgrades or make up any of the stupid rules for your plan, and I also agree with you that they are stupid rules. It’s patients and providers against the insurance companies- don’t yell at me when I’m on your side!

I definitely need to drink more water.

I could really use a technology free day by the ocean. Warm sun, a light breeze, sand in my toes, and the sounds of the ocean… I feel like that would heal me.

I’m annoyed that Tell Me Lies is over.

Monday / Moon Day

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This morning I woke up drenched in sweat and mother nature has come to visit with a vengeance apparently. It feels like all the collective rage that has been building up is releasing itself, and although it’s painful and exhausting, it’s necessary.

It’s technically the new moon as well, although it peaks tomorrow with a solar eclipse, so it just all feels like divine timing. With the eclipse starting off the year of the Fire Horse tomorrow, I have hope for a powerful, beautiful transition for the collective. Transitioning power from corrupt, evil systems, back to authentic, empathetic community.

Valentine’s Day

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Although it’s a Hallmark holiday, today is considered a day about love. I pray that this world can see love and light prevail over the darkness. It’s disheartening to see certain things all over the media, but also good that things are coming to light- so long as we do something about it.

Hello February

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Today is the start of a new month, and it also happens to be Sunday, and we have a full moon! This feels like a few different fresh beginnings and I am here for it!

Yesterday was so much fun! I loved catching up with my friend at starbucks, and I also loved hanging with my other friends doing diamond by number crafts! The canvases look hella intimidating at first, and honestly I am nowhere near done, but once you start doing it, it’s so easy to just get into flow state and keep going!

We had run to the dollar store before starting our crafts to grab little plastic organizers for our diamonds/beads, and we happened to find tiny keychain versions of diamond by numbers! We ended up each picking out one and my friend grabbed one for her daughter, as well as another small paint by number and we had a successful trip!

Today I’m catching up with my high school BFF at breakfast and I’m so excited to see her and enjoy a delicious omelette! She’s pregnant and her baby shower is a month away so I’m super happy for her and can’t wait to hear about how everything is going!

Later on my husband will go to his parents house for family dinner, and some point before or after that I will need to touch up his hair (I retwist his locs and I definitely skipped last weekend). I just feel like today is going to be a great day, and I’m just feeling so very blessed.

Vision Boarding

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Today I had a few friends over for a little vision boarding party! It was just four of us which ended up being very chill, and we all had a great time! I love making vision boards and just yapping w the gals while listening to a throwback playlist. It was definitely a great Saturday!

Tuesday Thoughts (Reflection)

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Yesterday was a ROUGH day for me. Between work, PMS, someone hitting my car with their door and not telling me, it’s safe to say I screamed the entire car ride home. I also believe I frightened the driver in front of me with my screaming as they sped TF off ahead of me LOL.

After releasing that anger on the way home, and then crying once I got home, I felt relief. I had time to reflect and recognize that all of the shit bothering me was not going to matter in a years time. Also everything felt amplified considering my period was arriving just a couple hours after that nice cry session.

Today I am making it a better day- just focusing on my work while listening to Morbid (podcast). Tomorrow is the full moon which is always a time for release, and that’s why the buildup to it feels so intense. Side note, I also am such a witchy weirdo that I’m all excited to be synced back up with the moon- it makes me feel like I am aligned.

As much as all of this life shit can suck, there’s also so much beauty and so many blessings around, and I’d rather spend my life focusing on the good so I don’t turn into one of those bitter, crotchety old people LOL.

September Prayers

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May September bring a calmness to your life, allowing you to slow down and be present.

May September show you that miracles can happen and there truly is magic in the world around you.

May September bring abundance and luck around every corner, surprising and inspiring your inner child.

May September allow you to soak in all that you’ve created and all that you have accomplished over the past few years.

You have evolved, and you will continue to evolve. The breakdowns have lead to breakthroughs. The hardships have strengthened your boundaries. You aren’t a never-ending project that needs fixing, you’re a unique, powerful being that deserves to love yourself in the same way that you love everyone else. May September open your eyes to that.