Spirituality

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How important is spirituality in your life?

It is quite important in my life at this time, and I feel like this recent loss in the family has had me really leaning into faith. I’ve seen so many signs that our loved one is still with us- she even visited me in a dream last night. I think she was trying to tell me that it never matters what others think or say about you, what matters is you follow your own dreams and do it now, because you never know how much time you have.

I know astrology sometimes goes hand in hand with spirituality, and I’ve been seeing a lot of posts about today (June 24) being a lucky day for everyone. Jupiter sits in Cazimi – which apparently means that Jupiter “sits in the heart of the sun.” Astrologers believe that means today the universe is answering our dreams, as long as we’re bold enough to ask for them. It’s a good morning to sit and think about what makes you feel the most joy in this lifetime.

For me, I feel joy when I’m with genuine, supportive people. I love being with good friends, having deep conversations, celebrating our evolutions, and just laughing at everything. I feel fueled after a good connection; I feel good after making someone feel empowered and uplifted. I feel good when I am being intentional with love, and when I am in tune with the universe.

Grateful Sunday

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Time to check in and count some blessings. Life’s been feeling heavy lately, and I am ready to release this energy and allow good vibes to flow. I know there is so much beauty beyond the pain when we are present enough to see it.

I am grateful for my husband- I’m blessed to have someone in my life who is such a supportive, caring person; truly my rock. I feel like I have a teammate in this lifetime, and I am so happy to see our evolution throughout the years. He makes me feel beautiful every day, and I just feel so lucky to have him in my life.

I am grateful that we both have our jobs. We’re blessed to have jobs that allow us to live our life comfortably, and we’re blessed to not hate our jobs as well. I’m very grateful to be at my current job, and honestly I can’t see myself leaving unless I actually get to be a stay at home mom one day. My husband has climbed up through departments at his job over the last ten years, and I’m just so proud of all of his growth.

I’m grateful for our home. We everything we could ever need in our home. From food and clean water, to appliances and electricity- we’re blessed to have access to all of these things and to be able to afford them.

I’m grateful for my genuine friends. I am blessed to have friends who truly love and support me for who I am. I have friends who don’t see me as competition or anything other than a loved one, and that’s how I see them as well. We all just want to see each other thriving and happy.

I am grateful for sunshine and nature. Sitting in the grass and just being still while soaking up the sun has been a way for me to ground myself and kind of let go. I’ve done this a few times during my current grieving, and I will say it feels good to just sit in it all. Being in nature just reminds me of how small we all are in this world, and how blessed we are to just be here.

More than honorable mentions: my cats, iced coffee, music, my car, slippers, yoga pants, my comfy bed, shampoo, youtube… there are truly so many things I could list, and for that I am also grateful. I live an incredible, abundant life, and although it feels heavy and dark at times, I know how lucky I am, and I know how important it is to check in and count our blessings.

Sat 6-21

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Today we went to my husband’s cousin’s funeral- it was rough. I swear I was the only one who was crying and not composed- and I’m like damn, am I really the only one who feels? To be fair, the older we get, the more loss we have to experience. I’m sure many of the older people have been through this so many times that they may be more used to it- or numb to it. I’ve felt that numbness before, but today it was just waves- like I was feeling all the things that everyone else was refusing to feel.

Thursday

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Another day, another vet visit. We had a glucose monitor put on our cat Mushu, and the next day when I got home from work we noticed she removed it. We can try another one, but we know she will just remove it again, so we’re going back to just doing lab work. Hopefully her numbers look better and maybe we can stay on this insulin dose for her.

picture by: my husband

Wednesday Word Vomit

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I’m pretty sure grief has put me into a freeze state. There are many moments where I just sit and don’t want to do anything, and I don’t feel like moving my body until the anger hits me.

Sometimes I hate how angry/upset I get when people want to discuss politics. I know it comes from the fact that I don’t trust anything on the media/news when it comes to politics, but also because it seems to feed division and chaos.

I feel like I’d be more confident if I actually followed through on my own goals and dreams, yet I still seem to just ignore my own wants and needs. Or do I not know them?

I’m tired and want to go back to bed for the rest of the day, but instead I’ll be leaving for work here in a few minutes.