What could you do more of?
Meditating, releasing, and letting go.
What could you do more of?
Meditating, releasing, and letting go.
What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?
Since I’ve been on a mental health / healing journey, I have come across a lot of golden nuggets of wisdom and advice. When I read this prompt, what immediately came to mind is something that Mel Robbins has discussed on her podcast and what her next book topic is about: “Let them.”
The whole point of the “Let Them Theory” is to have a better sense of inner peace as well as control over one’s own mindset. We can do this by not taking things personally, but also by recognizing that we have no control over how someone else behaves and it is not our responsibility to control them.
Sometimes we let other people’s actions and beliefs affect our own lives, by constantly thinking about, judging or trying to “fix” them. It’s also kind of funny because we know how hard it is to change ourselves and develop new habits, yet we can get so bothered by other people not changing who they are. Instead of focusing on how someone else is living their life, just let them.
What things give you energy?
-sitting in the sun
-walking in nature
-reading
-listening to a podcast
-good music (dancing, singing, playing, listening, etc.)
-phone calls/facetimes with friends
-iced coffee (literally LOL)
-meaningful conversations
Which topics would you like to be more informed about?
I honestly have been intrigued by astrology more and more, although many people would say it’s “fake” or “woohoo,” I am still interested in the symbolism behind the signs, planets, and houses. I don’t think I’d ever do chart readings for anyone else, unless maybe friends, but it would really be more for myself.
Share a lesson you wish you had learned earlier in life.
If there’s anything I wish I would have learned or known earlier, it’s that I should be keeping my own peace, not everyone else’s. I didn’t need to stay sheltered away, hiding my true feelings and thoughts as a way to make sure I never made anyone else feel uncomfortable. I didn’t need to keep saying “yes” to things out that I really wanted to say “no” to, because a fake yes is really just a resentful one, and no one wants that either.
I wish I had recognized just how toxic “people-pleasing” was, because in reality, it’s manipulative and completely inauthentic. It makes so much sense to me now, and I see how avoiding potential conflict just delays having any sort of meaningful conversations and connections. I also see how wild it is to put so much on your plate to be “helpful” for others, just to burn out and feel resentful when, in reality, you didn’t have to help in the first place.
It’s much better to be open and honest if you want to create and true friendships/relationships. It’s important to be mindful and intentional with our words, and that does include saying how we feel and sharing our own opinions so that we can authentically connect with others. If you share your true self with someone and they don’t like it, now you both have the ability to decide if it is a relationship worth keeping.
I never needed to deny my own gut feelings or opinions, I have always been allowed to share them. I know in the past I struggled a lot more with self-worth, so it was much harder to deal with the thought of losing a friendship. Now, as I have been healing and learning more about myself, I’d rather have real friends who truly know and support the real me.
I know who I am and how much I care about others, and I know that my close connections deserve to know the real me. I now am able to say “no” to things without feeling guilty, I am able to express an opinion that could be rough to hear and not be worried or afraid, because I know I am being true to myself.
I am an open-minded person, and I am able to empathize, but I also have to have boundaries to remain healthy. It has been quite a journey, but I vow to myself that I will no longer dim my own light or make myself small for the sake of “keeping the peace.” Instead I will focus on keeping my own peace, and that means being completely honest and authentic.
Do you see yourself as a leader?
In some ways, yes, because I am good with planning and organizing, and coming up with solutions. I have been office manager/team leader in past jobs and love to find the best way to make the days as least stressful as possible, but also I hated the part where it came to conflict with employees. I hated having to talk to someone when they were late or when mistakes were consistently being made, so that part makes it hard when it comes to being a leader.
What’s your favorite word?
It’s not even a real word, but I’m loving using the word “shooketh.” Example: today the juicer I wanted arrived at my home because my bosses went in on it together and bought it for me as a wedding gift- I was shooketh.
What are you doing this evening?
This evening I don’t really have any set plans, other than making sure I shower and get my lunch ready for tomorrow. I may pick up playing some Sims, or I may watch Selling Sunset on Netflix. Or I may go on a walk or Facetime with a friend. Once my fiancé is home we will eat some dinner and catch up about our day, and then I’ll go back to whatever I was doing so he can wind down with his video games. It’s usually pretty chill in the evenings, which I am grateful for. 🤍
What personality trait in people raises a red flag with you?
Biggest red flag for me: someone who cannot take accountability. Someone who is consistently blaming others for their own mistakes and never admitting to/owning up to what they did is someone I’d rather not associate with. We’re all human, we all make mistakes, but we will never learn and grow from them if we don’t take time to acknowledge or fix the issue.
Describe your ideal week.
As much as I do enjoy my job, I can tell you that my ideal week does not include going to work. Instead, my ideal week would look more like a vacation, or staycation depending on the location.
The week would include slow mornings where there is no rush to get out of bed, but once I’m up I’d be able to just step outside and absorb some sunlight. Preferably on a beach or some secluded area without any whack ass neighbors LOL.
The week would include delicious food, stimulating conversations, and overall great company. I always love when my fiancé and I get to connect with our friends and enjoy a nice meal or an outing together. Whether it’s grabbing breakfast together or going on a walk, the week would be full of simple joys.
Considering that I absolutely LOVE concerts, my ideal week would have to include at least one show and that would ideally be Qveen Herby. I just saw her in July and I was thoroughly impressed by her talent and the performance she put on, and 10/10 want to see her again.
I love traveling, even if it’s just a 1-2 hour trip to a new destination. If this ideal week is a staycation, then it’s going to have to include a weekend trip to the Dells! I absolutely love water parks and arcades like a child I am deep down, and it would be so fun to have a group of friends all go together!
This prompt has me getting excited for our wedding/honeymoon that is coming up here in the next few weeks, because all of our closest loved ones are joining us for our beach destination wedding! We get to have a day after with our closest friends to celebrate our marriage and just enjoy each other’s presence.